To my love that was
Hi, I trust this letter finds you well at this beautiful Morning,
As a pen this letter down, I hope you will read and nod in agreement,
I am writing with two things in my mind,
If you could open my mind and read its content,
Am sure you could write a novel,
I will follow what my counselling lecturer told me,
” You have to keep it simple,precise and to the point”
As I lay my head in bed,am stormed by multitude of memories,
Beautiful and sad at the same time.
Today I will not accuse you of anything,I leave the blame game and choose to apologise
Apologising is beautiful, apologising is peaceful,
It aids in making peace with your past so that it cannot ruin your future,
Am sorry for the things I said to you my love,
Am sorry for letting you choose her over me,
Am sorry that fate never favoured our destiny,
I am sorry I walked away,I pushed you away,
I am hoping someday you will tell me that you have forgiven me,
Am sorry that the mindset of us going back are unwise,
Going back to those ancient days,when love felt like a joyful morning,
Going back to the crossroads and asking where we went wrong,
How I said am getting married is still fresh in my mind. I was stupid, I was bitchy.
How you said you have introduced her to your parents is something I have learnt to accept,
When you texted me how much you miss me,I felt it within myself,
But I hesitated,
I couldn’t imagine ruining someone’s union for my selfish gain.
I couldn’t imagine myself replying “I miss you too”,
I had to swallow this honey that was bitter,
I had to train my heart on moving on,
I was determined, I purposed and I knew it was a “ride or die choice”
If I had not done it,be assured someone could be nursing depression today,
I realised my past was never a mistake,
Because I choose to learn from it,
I packaged my memories in a box and labelled it “Thank you”,
I believed that,what was mine will never miss the way home,
I let go. I started living another day,
Its true our memories will never fade,
But holding to them hurts more,so I chose to let go,
The heartaches ,the blame,the tears,the grief,
Today as I write,I have conquered that which was meant to break me,
I have conquered the war in my mind and am set for another journey,
My mama told me to never say “never”,
because if we allow our mistakes to define us,
We will live like slaves,captives of our own mind,
I choose freedom and I walked the journey,
Of course with Sweet Jesus on the wheels,
THINGS GOT BETTER.
Are you there faced with a heartbreak,
Look again,beyond a new door has opened for you,a new dawn has come.
My love that was,I forgave you. I hope you will too.
I wish you well in your new love life,
May she bring you as much joy as your wishes.
Karembo AKA Kamum